When you have a significant other, it's inevitable there will be different views, ideas and opinions.
And, on occasion, those differences will manifest in what can be described as a lively discussion full of spirited debate and the exchanging of ideas.
For some reason, the man actually thinks he has a snowball's chance in hell of winning the um, er, exchange of ideas.
I have learned that winning an argument with your wife is like trying to outrun a dog: it's just not going to happen. For the first few seconds, you may think you're doing well, but it doesn't take long before the dog is nipping at your heels and you realize the futility of your endeavour.
Women are just much better at expressing their thoughts and feelings than their male partners.
For me, the problem is even worse because my wife is so much smarter than I am. She is also much more in tune with her inner self. I know I have an inner self, but we rarely communicate other than the occasional "What's up?" as we pass each other in the vacant expanse of the male emotional desert.
Part of the reason women are so much more adept at "discussing" things is they have history on their side.
In ancient days of yore, the man did not have to be a strong orator. He just had to be strong. His job was to keep the clan safe from enemy attacks, marauding bears and the occasional Jehovah's Witness who always showed up unannounced when he was busy doing something.
To do this, he had to be physically strong. When it was the survival of the fittest, the big survived and the small wound up at the end of a spear.
There wasn't a lot of need for men to be in touch with their inner feelings back then. The only thing they needed to feel was the spear in their hand as they vanquished foes and kept the village safe from harm.
They didn't have to talk their way out of a battle; they had to fight their way out. Men used steel, wood and their bare hands to get their point across.
While the men were out fighting each other for territory, riches, food or even bragging rights, the women were back in the cave or hut talking things out. They didn't have to stomp on the bones of their opponents to claim victory.
They didn't need brute force to get their point across.
Way back then, there was a need for men to be big and strong; being smart wasn't that important.
The need to be in touch with one's inner self and express your emotions in a clear and concise manner didn't arise very often on the field of battle.
Being strong enough to bludgeon a buffalo with a rock, now that was important.
Over the millennia, men have continued on with their muscular ways, but it is just not as important today, at least not in our culture.
There are not a lot of marauding bears in suburbia, so what good do all those muscles do us?
Not much; and those bulging biceps mean absolutely nothing when it comes to
having a "discussion" with your significant other.
While men were working on their ability to go into battle, women were busy broadening their minds, vocabulary and ability to communicate. Which is why us husbands so rarely win an argument.
It may happen on occasion, but it's like a Sasquatch sighting - you hear of it, but you don't really believe it.
Darren Handschuh can be reached at This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it . For more of his ramblings, check out his blog at www.therudemonkey.blogspot.com.